I do not know if you are religious or not, but I wish to share something with you that has helped me.
“When we allow God to come into our lives (or we are wise enough to come into His) He “enlarges our steps” for the path we must walk – or, in more modern language, He gives us bigger feet that do not slip.”
“But other elements of God’s miraculous help consists of things He does to, in effect, let us help ourselves. Some paths we feel we just can’t walk. Some mountains seem just too high to climb. Some steps are just too difficult to take. When that is so, heaven does intervene, but often it is not to smooth out the path or remove the mountain or shorten the steps. More often than not, God sends help in a different way. He makes us stronger and more sure-footed. In effect, He gives us bigger feet, stronger legs, a firmer back, more stiffened shoulders. He deals with us rather than with the problem we face. We then proceed with new strength, less slipping, and are all the stronger for it.” Jeffery R Holland, an Apostle of the Lord Jesus Christ.
Just as you have illnesses that frustrate you, I too have many disabling illnesses. Arthritis, at times so bad, that my neck; shoulders; back; arms; knees; even my fingers and toes tend to hurt even just to move them. I also have stomach issues: GERD and Barrett’s Disease, thus, at times, I vomit a lot. I had a hole in my right eye and lost all the fluid. I was horribly abused as a small child and in my growing up years. I had more blows to my head than a boxer receives over many years in the ring. I had been in a car accident that almost cost me my life. My children had been kidnapped when they were mere babies. I have had recurring bouts with cancer. As a child, I had protein malnutrition.
It came to pass in my life, there was a period of time (four years in fact) that I had to stay mostly in bed or at a hospital. During that time, I contracted e-coli; double pneumonia; blood clots; and Cellulitis on my legs so bad that I almost died from each as well as could have lost both my legs. I have been in and out of various types of hospitals since I was about 6 years old. The majority of the time I have had zero help from others. When I developed cancer as a young woman, my husband walked out on me and my new baby to fend for ourselves.
As you can see, I understand just how hard some of you have it in life. Yet, I want you to know that the words of Jeffrey R Holland are true. I testify to you that I am able to walk now. I can see again with both eyes and there are no more lesions on my brain. The growths throughout my body are all gone. I still have both legs. I still have issues, yes, however, I can do more now and be happier than I have ever been in my entire life.
Psalms 18: 36 “Thou hast enlarged my steps under me, that my feet did not slip.”
Psalms 94:17-19 “Unless the Lord had been my help, my soul had almost dwelt in silence. When I said, My foot slippeth; thy mercy, O Lord, held me up. In the multitude of my thoughts within me thy comforts delight my soul.”
Jesus is “The Christ” in Greek = Messiah in Hebrew. We know that Jehovah = God of the earth of the Old Testament. I learned that Jesus is the Christ, by what I experienced as a small child. He took me out of that closet. He was with me in that back yard. He was with me at my uncle’s home. He was with me in institutions. God sent missionaries to find me when I was out in the desert in Arizona and they taught me all I needed to know: so that I could recognize that it was He who had been with me as a child in California. There might be mistakes in the scriptures, yet they are men’s mistakes not God’s. God lives. Jesus is the Christ. The Atonement He made on our behalf is real, if we will seek it. The Holy Spirit is real. He teaches us truth and never lies.
I don’t mean to be preachy, but I felt you needed to hear these things this morning. Please, don’t give up. I know how badly you want all this crap to end, but don’t give up. I know there are times when it gets bad before it can get better. What you are going through will not last forever.
“Counsel with the Lord in all thy doings, and He will direct thee for good; yea, when thou liest down at night lie down unto the Lord, that He may watch over you in your sleep; and when thou risest in the morning let thy heart be full of thanks unto God; and if ye do these things, ye shall be lifted up at the last day.” Alma 37:37