“Choose carefully each day that which you will do and that which you will not do, and the Lord will bless you to accomplish the important things that have eternal consequences.” Marjorie Pay Hinckley
There have been times when I have messed up. I reacted poorly to that which was happening to me. When I was young, I had no clue who I really was, thus, I became what my family taught me. I became a liar and a thief. I stole to feed myself and my little girl. I lied so no one would know truth about my family. I believed I was a murderer, as my mother had died because of me, thus I deserved all those horrible things I had gone through. I had burned down my uncle’s house, therefore I believed I was an arsonist. The reality was, my mother survived until I was 3.6 years old, and the fire was an accident, but I knew that not until I was older. For too many years the case was, I had been taught wrong principles, however, when I was almost 30 years old, I heard that I am really a child of God who lived with my Heavenly Parents before I came to my mortal parents.
In Proverbs 22:6 it reads:
“Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.”
A child of God is what I had yearned to be, even before I knew how old I was; way back, when I was living in my father’s back yard. I had heard about a God who protected His children from the old black book my sister found, which had belonged to my mother. I had wanted to have a father like the one who protected Shadrach, Meshach and Aded-nego (Daniel 3), and low and behold, here I was being assured that I do, in fact, have a Father who does loves me.
I am grateful to my second step-mother for sending me to a parochial school for a few months so that I could learn who Jesus Christ was. Little did I know back then, that He not only was the son of God, but He is still alive and He loves me, personally.
Learning line upon line, step upon step, I have found true happiness. Over the course of many years I have learned so much. Truth is, I still have problems, but now I can handle each one that comes into my life. I must share with you one situation, that is very frustrating to me. That is the way the elderly are treated. Because of my early youth, I have been locked up many times, as I am different than a “normal” person. Some feel I should never be allowed to be on my own.
There was a local hospital, where the “doctor” believed I should be drugged, and since I refused to partake, he kept trying to trick me into taking the drugs. He ordered others to do certain things which would cause me to lose my temper. However, he was not aware that I had been tricked when I was young, so I knew what was being done. Only once were they able to restrain me and drug me. I was able to obtain some scriptures, so each morning and evening, I read words that gave me comfort. Even when they grabbed me and caused great pain to my body, I continued to pray for them. Yes, a few times, I did lose my cool and yell, however, I repented afterwards, and finally, the time came when others working there called those who could help me and they were forced to take me to court. They had to prove I was insane and did not deserve to return to my home. The Lawyer and the Judge were on my side, which irritated those whom wanted me locked up. Nonetheless, they had to release me.
While I was locked up, I was able to comfort others, and teach some of those who did not know Jesus Christ and how much He loved them. I invited many to pray and they did. I was blessed in that there was one male nurse who has showed up each time I have been locked up. He is of my same faith, and while others did things to cause me pain and then stood about mocking and laughing, he came into my room and helped me many times. After I was released, I asked that he be given a certificate of appreciation, and a pay raise. This last time, I learned that he was moving and going to open his own clinic. He was training many others in how to treat the elderly and be of help rather than harm. I am so proud of him.
While my life is not over yet, I have found there are those who validate me, and are helping me to be the best I can be. God truly does watch over His children, even in times of trial. He knows His children, and when we choose to do what is right, He has great joy. As a loving Father, I am sure that when we chose to not do what is right, it gives Him great sorrow. I l pray that I may endure well whatever comes, so that I can be with Him and Heavenly Mother for all eternity. I want to personally thank my Lord for all He did and is doing for me. I am a child of God.